Is virginity a problem???

What to do if your girlfriend turns out to be a virgin? Sure thing, you are shocked, but at the same time proud, that you may become her first man. But virginity is to some extend a problem, because the longer she doesn’t give up, the more painful the process is likely to be. The specialists claim, that the most appropriate age for first sex is from 18 till 20. But if it already so happened, you have to take things under your control and try to change the situation. Unless she knows what she misses, she won’t agree to this. Besides, she must rely upon you and believe you, otherwise she won’t consider you to be that special one, she has been waiting for.

Don’t insist on having sex – in the long run she has to make her own decision and to dare to do it at last! It’s normal she will be nervous and frightened, cause doesn’t know what awaits her, and her friends’ tips won’t be of good avail here.

Being an expert in the matter (so far) you have to be very tender, caring, but at the same time determined. Do not hurry up, move slowly, but confidently, ask her how she feels. The first sex leaves an unforgettable impression on women and to some extend form her attitude to sex, so be careful and do not let things go out of your control.

She must be sure that there is not danger of pregnancy. Discuss the choice of contraceptives before and choose one that suits you perfectly. If she is confident of safe sex, she is likely to relax better.

Make foreplay longer, it will allow her to relax and really want you. Kiss her, examine her body, see what she likes and what she doesn’t. If she is ashamed of her body, convince her that she is as beautiful as never before.

Be especially careful at the beginning of penetrating – in this stage she is likely to feel a minor amount of pain and later when you come to virginal membrane itself. When these two barriers are overcome, you both can sigh with relief.

Besides, you should be ready to face her refusal at the responsible moment. She seemed to want it, but got frightened and felt she was not ready. If it happens, don’t insist and show that you understand her and are ready to wait. Another variant – make her believe that she was right when decided to give up; she may need your approval and support. But do it carefully and gently – otherwise you’ll spoil everything!

Your main task is to prove that sex, so mush discussed, is really a pleasant thing and she won’t lose, but gain another important aspect of her life!

Your gifts and her thoughts about them…

The coming season of holidays will require from you a number of presents for your girl-friend. For me personally it is always a difficult job. To choose a good present, to meet her demands and make her happy is far from an easy task. Besides, women are likely to interpret the presents in their own way and very often not alone, but with the help of their mother, best friend, colleagues at work etc. As you see, a problem rises here – how not to pull a boner. But there is always a way out, consider the following information and make your choice!

Perfumes.
In order your girlfriend to like the gift, you should know her and her taste perfectly well, otherwise you are really risking. If you think that buying perfumes is an easy task, you are mistaken, ‘cause your better half is unlikely to wear a scent she dislikes only because it was your gift. So if you are not sure of her tastes, don’t buy perfumes.

Jewelry.
Jewelry is rather expensive gift and if you choose it as your present you hint that you love her and that these relations are really very important for you. Do not hurry up to present her with jewelry; otherwise you may face two problems: she may be scared, if is not sure of her own feelings or you may be accused of trying to buy her attention.

Gargets.
Life in the 21st century is next to impossible without different gargets and small devices. They are also rather expensive and by choosing such a present you show your care and love, you prove that you are eager to make her life easier and more convenient. She will be glad to get iPod or a new handy as a present. So don’t save money on your close people!

Trips.
Another zero-risk gift is suggesting of spending time together. Depending on the sum you are ready to spend it may be an exotic trip or just a weekend in a cottage – only you and she. Any woman will appreciate such a gift, because you show that it is of vital importance for you to spend more time with her. Besides, it is the best way out, if you are not sure which material present will meet her demands.

Food and drink.
Frankly speaking these are not gifts at all! A bar of chocolate will be all right if you want to do something pleasant for her, but it is not that size for a present! A bottle of wine and chocolate are too general and do not express either your attitude towards her or your real feelings.

Lingerie.
This is the most intimate present from all described above. And presenting your girlfriend with lingerie has several pitfalls. If she is rather emancipated and doesn’t blush speaking about sex, she is sure to like your gift (if you know her taste, of course), in this case you may experiment and even ask her to try the gift on on the spur of the moment! But if she is too conservative your attempts to make her happy will fall flat. She may even get offended for your interference into her too private life.

Sure thing, these are not all possible ideas for the gifts. It’s up to you to decide what is likely and what is unlikely to make her happy and make at the same time feel at ease. If you know the person well enough, you can go ahead with some extraordinary crazy gift ideas, if not – try not to offend anybody’s feelings. A bit of fantasy and desire to surprise her will do their business – she will be happy!

What is it that women want from men?

Women all over the world are fighting with men for their own rights, personal freedom and independence. This movement is known as feminism. At the same time, I’m inclined to think, that women will be women and despite all their success in career, studies etc. they need to be treated like women and are never against chivalry.

Perhaps, we’ll never understand the reasons for getting offended when we didn’t kiss her and she expected us to do it. For us it is a trifle, for her – personal tragedy. Learn how to avoid such ambivalence in relations.

Don’t forget to phone her back!
Women need much attention. It doesn’t mean that you have to call her 100 times a day and say that you miss her, want her, need her… It is enough to call her back saying a couple of tender words you are sure to find for your sweetheart. One or two sentences will be enough to show her that you do care and that you are not indifferent to her.

Kiss her without reasons!
This is what I meant at the beginning. Kiss her with no reasons to show that you want her, that you are interested in sex only with her. If at the same time you hold her hand, you’ll make her extremely happy and eager to do something pleasant for you.

Dress for her!
If you dress up for her, she is sure not only to notice it, but moreover she is sure to appreciate it. Women like sharp-dressed men and only these men are sure to arouse interest and sex appeal in women. If you don’t want to lose your girl-friend’s affection, wear a nice shirt and dress pants – the result and effects won’t make you wait long.

Dance with her!
For a woman a dance with a beloved person will always contain some romance and intimacy, something that makes her feel special and always desired. Don’t be stubborn and agree to go out with her, ask her for a dance, embrace her, make each moment of your relations unforgettable. Try it and you’ll see that you like it too!

Remember all birthdays and anniversaries!
Nothing can get her monkey up more than your forgetting some important (for her) dates. Besides, if you want to keep your privacy and intimacy as long as possible, try to remember even insignificant dates: when you first kissed her, when you said you loved her for the first time, where you spent your first vacation together, what you noticed about her the first time you met… These trifles-details will provide your relations with intimacy and trust – she will be always ready to depend on you.

Visit her family!
Nothing will happen to you if you visit her parents from time to time. It will be pleasant for both sides: she will adore you for paying attention to her family, her parents won’t complain of her rare visits – you will cover your weak points (if you behave in a right way and don’t overreact).

If you ask me, “What is it that women want from men”, I’ll say that small things do matter. If you neglect those details that are of vital importance for her, you neglect all the relations. And when only she feels neglected, lots of other problems will show their real faces. Let the sleeping lie, take this information as food for thought and enjoy your being together!!!

Some women you are never to date with

There are some women you should never touch with a bargepole. It’s not because they are bad, good or something else. That springs from the fact that they play their own role in your life and it is desirable that you should not forget about it, if you want to save your reputation, your friends and your money.

Your best friend’s sister
Many people are convinced, that friendship between a man and a woman cannot exist. If you are a lucky chap and have a female friend, don’t be stupid and never date with her sister. Otherwise you are likely to lose both: your sweetheart and your best friend. A friend is a friend, bit as soon as it touches upon her family she will be ready to forget about your friendship when only you offend her sister.

Your secretary
Relations at work almost always result in an abject failure. Everybody pretends to know nothing, gossiping behind your back. You cannot concentrate on your work because of her, the failure comes after failure and in the end you have neither lover nor career. Mind it before jumping into your secretary’s bed (or before having sex in the janitor’s closet).

Your ex-girlfriend
Whenever you feel lonely and seem to want your ex-girlfriend, think twice and only then jump into the relationships. Remember what caused your break, the same is sure to happen again sooner or later. Do not let memories win. There were sure lots of pleasant moments and she is sure to be great, sexy and very attractive, but she IS in the list!

Your friend’s ex
Even if they are no longer together, even if they are good friends, even if he says, “I don’t care”, it is still taboo. If you start dating with your friend’s ex, you may say good-bye to your friendship. Soon everybody will know what kind of friend you are and you’ll lose your reputation. As well as in case with your best female friend’s sister, keep your eyes peeled!

The stripper
If for you dating and relationships mean more than mere sex, strippers are also in your black list! Jealousy, constant quarrels and ding-dongs will spoil and poison these relations very quickly. Nothing good will come out of it!

These are those women you should never date unless you like troubles. Mind it when you make a pass at somebody from the list!

See when a woman is really unterested in you

It’s almost unbearable for a man to be rejected by a woman. It hurts not only his feelings, but more his self-esteem and male’s ego. They try to pick up some giveaway clues to find out whether she is really hooked. But very often they are mislead by these clues and feel as if duped.

The reason for such misunderstanding lies in the fact, that females very often do not understand themselves. No wonder that you fail to make a head or tail of the whole situation! Still, there are some signs-signals by means of which you can see that she is really interested in you.

She “accidentally” occurs on your way several types during the day, even if you live in different parts of the city. You meet her in the street, in the café or nearest club. By behaving in such a way, woman pushes you to another step, she signals, that she likes you, but it’s you who have to do the next step. And if you read the signal correctly, you are not a long way from your dream!

Body language is the best signal. Even paying no attention to the movements, she can easily give all her intensions out, using some vivid gestures: she points in your direction with her leg, foot or shoulders, she leans toward you while talking, she plays with or tosses her hair, she toys with a piece of jewelry (like an earring) or strokes the stem of her glass, she keeps her eyes locked on you while she talks or drinks, she mirrors your body movements, she smiles when you check her out. These are really giveaway clues, which show that she is interested in you.

She tends to make a fuss out of your presence. Especially if you fail to read her signals, she will try to attract your attention by all means. Besides, if you notice that she is jealous to other women you are talking to, you may be 100% sure that she wants you to be more than just a friend.

She is never in a hurry. If the woman finds you interested, she is sure to give you her phone number, e-mail address and will gladly accept your invitation to go out. Even if she is really busy that very day, she is likely to say, “Well, I really can’t this Sunday, but next weak will be great”. And on the contrary, if you hear some phrases like "I'm really busy right now," or "Let me check my schedule," sorry, you have no chances! She is telling you Good Bye!

"The Probe" is the female tool used for evaluating a man's financial resources. It looks like a series of casual questions, but behind it a ruthless calculator counts everything. When a woman first meets a man that she is interested in, she will quiz him on his job, where he lives and what kind of car he has, all within a natural conversation. If you give the "right" answers, then the flirting signals will follow; but if not – this is not your chance!

These are the most obvious giveaway clues picking up which you get be sure that the girl of your dreams is really interested in you. Mind, that if the case is really that serious, you’ll notice more than one such signal, perhaps, your future partner is simply open-hearted and doesn’t mean any romance. So keep your eyes peeled and don’t hurry with your conclusions!

Some things You should never tell Her

Relationships are usually a really hard work. If you relax and forget about it, you get lots of problems, misunderstanding and quarrels. You try to be always honest and call a spade a spade? Great, but not always wise! There are some things you should never tell your girlfriend if you don’t want to get her monkey up or even worse – break and spoil everything good you had.

Never tell her that she is fat or that she’s put on weight!
Even if it is really so, you’d better not dare to tell her about. It goes without saying that women are very much concerned about their weight, and if she’s put on some weight, she will notice it even without your comments. But if say something of the kind, she may think that you don’t find her attractive and sexy any longer. And this, in its own turn, may cause some serious problems in your relations!

Don’t tell her that your mom would have done this better!
Especially, if she tried to do her best, but failed! If you do say things like that from time to time, you are a mommy’s son and your relations are doomed to failure. Don’t compare her with her mom and the way your mother does the things. Your girlfriend will get offended and next time if not leaves you, but won’t try to do something pleasant for you! You love her for what and who she is, that’s why there’s no need to compare her with anybody else, even if it is your mom!

Don’t tell her about your ex!
Would you like to be always compared with some obscure figure from your partner’s past? Perhaps, not. Neither wants she! Especially, if it touches some intimate spheres of your life like sex. If you tell your girlfriend what a great sex you had with your ex, she will feel defective and won’t be able to relax concentrating on the process itself and her own desire to give you pleasure!

Don’t ask her to relax when she is upset or angry!
In general be careful with this word! Even if you don’t mean anything bad, your girlfriend is likely to get offended whenever asked to relax. It may seem to her that you don’t take her seriously and say these words in order to get rid of her! Consider what and in what situation you say! One careless word may cause you hours of showdown.

Don’t tell her that you don’t like her friends!
Of course, nobody forces you to like her friends. But you shouldn’t say anything bad about them either. She knows them for quite a lot period of time and is likely to reasons for that, besides, you have also some friends she doesn’t like either.
On the other extreme, don’t tell her that you like her friend! Even if you really like some of her friends, keep it a secret and don't tell your actual partner about it. Otherwise she may get hurt and angry and will stop trusting you!

Mind, that if you don’t tell all these things to your girlfriend, it doesn’t mean, that you are not honest. It means that you really care about her and don’t want to cause unnecessary worries and troubles in her life!

Going on a blind date: dare it or not?

I believe that almost everyone at least once on his life experienced the thrilling feeling of going on a blind date. On the one hand, you are very excited because you don’t know what awaits you and on the other – may lose all your hope after having seen our date.

For you not to go the limit, some rules of blind dating.

1. Do not be either too optimistic or too pessimistic. In general, don’t make a mountain out of a molehill. If the date turns out to be the woman of your dreams, you are a lucky chap and you’ll be really surprised. If somehow your date is not quite the one you expected, do not get upset at once, talk to her, spend the whole evening, and only then, if see that really nothing will come out of this, say “Good bye”. Do not put off this talk, otherwise it may drag on for months if not more. Be frank. Woman would rather prefer your lie to your pretence in relations.

2. Be attentive and caring. Women as well as men go to blind dates with rather low expectations, thus, it’s up to you to turn the situation into something sincere and intimate. Try not to be too nervous and make her feel at ease.

3. Do not start telling her about your problems! Present yourself as a mysterious book she’ll never get tired to read. If she knows that you live with…, work at…, sleep with… etc, she won’t need another date – she knows you already but hardly likes…

4. Keep in mind that though a blind date, but still it is the first date, so try not to spoil anything. Remember my pieces of advice?
Be yourself, be at ease, feel comfortable and don’t allow yourself too much. You need to control the situation and see, where you can say and where you can also touch…

Is different behavior of males and females programmed in our brains?

What is it that makes us so different? What can’t we find common ground and at the same time feel terrible when apart? Can psychology explain us everything?

In differentiating between men and women, in finding out roots of this difference, we should go back to the times of primitive society and mammoths. Man was always considered the head of the family (= herd) and his main function was to bring food and give good posterity. He was never at home; he spent nights and days hunting mammoths in order to maintain his family. And it was not an easy task. Whenever he came back home he tried to fecundate as many females as possible and with the feeling of a well done job came back to hunting!

Let’s compare the situation. If today men are accused of trying to have as many woman as possible, it is not their actual fault, these are our grand-grand-grand…fathers who are to blame. As there are some useless organs-rudiments in our body, in the same way we cannot get rid completely of that call of the wild. We try to be loyal to one woman, want to create a family, but deep in the soul we need time to “hunt a mammoth” and cannot help looking at other women. Those who are not that strong, give up, letting “the call of the wild” prevail and want to know other women as well.

Women on the other hand were always considered to be keepers of the hearth and their main function was always giving birth and taking care of their children. Besides, all the work about the house was theirs as well. That’s why our women are much stronger emotionally, can resist to hardships and do several things at a time. And men, who had to concentrate on a huge mammoth to stay alive, could do only one thing. Isn’t it the same today???

These are those things we cannot change. As they say, if you can’t beat them, join them! So let’s try to turn these peculiarities to our good account. It’s easier to know how to behave if you possess the information and can choose this or that line of behavior.

Make friends with a Condom!

There exists a perpetuated stereotype that condoms are always in the way of our satisfaction and do not bring anything good but for inconvenience and lack of eroticism. It’s just the time we got rid of it!

The choice of condoms at the market is very rich and they can not only prevent us and our partner from pregnancy, transmission of HIV, genital warts, herpes, Syphilis, Gonorrhea, but also add new experience to our sexual life! Men claim that sex with a condom is not at all sex, ‘cause they cannot feel anything! You are rather poor lovers, I’d say, and didn’t even try to choose a condom to your heart’s (oops, sorry, penis’) content! Crown Skinless is rather popular now as a very thin condom you do not almost feel. Try it and only then will probably (!) have something to object!

Besides, condoms may become a good solution for those women who experience vaginal dryness and loss of natural lubrication. The feeling of dryness can be rather unpleasant and spoil the whole thing, but if you use a good quality lubricant such as Liquid Silk or a condom Durex Elite, you kill two birds with one stone!

Some condoms are specially created to bring both partners more satisfaction – try ribbed or dotted condoms: they are likely to provide your partner with additional stimulation; or use Durex Performa: these will enable you last longer and your partner – reach orgasm!

Are to big or too small? Do not say that you failed to buy the right condom! It’s just a lame excuse! Give preference to Durex Close Fit if you're small but perfectly formed. Big boys should try Trojan Magnum XL, the biggest condom available in the UK at the moment!

You say that you are allergic to latex? Choose latex free condoms for your sensitive body!

Can create some other objections? I doubt it! It’s up to you which kind of contraception you choose, but do not be too biased as far as the condoms are concerned. And if you say that only condoms are guilty in all your sexual misunderstanding with your partner, I’d doubt your sexual skills rather, than bad condoms!

What do we talk about when we talk about love?

Love, relations, sex, partnership – these are all things we cannot do without. Sometimes we need only sex, but very soon sex without feelings loses its attractiveness and we feel that we need something deeper than only sex; we need some warmth, care, tenderness, eventually we need someone to take care of!

I feel quite at a loss, when I hear some people saying that love doesn’t exist, that it is all down to lust and chemical reactions of our body. We only need sex to be fit and feel like real males-conquerors! Do we???

Lust is considered to be one of deadly things and it is not worth connecting everything with our biological necessity of coupling. Lust does influence our sexual behavior, but I’d rather call it “desire”, “sexual attraction” or simply but correctly “sexuality”.

Bare sex doesn’t distinguish us from animals. Animals in their turn do not couple with anybody either! But we very often do! Perhaps, someone will find this parallel offensive, but I only write what I consider to be reality and our every day experience.

I do not mean to offend anybody, but favor that point of view, that those males who are having sex nights and days and regard every female as the next object of their sexual aggression, are rather unhappy inside and try to hide that under the guise of a constant lover. An acquaintance of mine keeps to this strategy in life and considers that all women want him. In his turn he is ready to satisfy them (health permitting!) and claims to be happy! But I can hardly believe!

Roots of such behavior go back to the past and are caused by some past actions or events. This my acquaintance always lacked women’s attention and was never popular with them. Now he’s trying to prove everybody and himself that he is not a complete failure, that women are interested in him and want to have sex with him! But I am convinced that deep in his soul he’s unhappy and after he gets tired of this constant process of self-assertion, the only feeling he’s likely to have is bitterness and vacuousness.

Very often under the outer bravado a very touchy soul is hidden. The desire to feel like a peacock and mark your territory will soon pass into the background as soon as you find a deeper aim of your life. Isn’t it food for thought?

Make her want you, kiss her…

What can be the first step to sex? Kiss… But of course, if you know how to do it correctly! Women consider kiss an important and integral part of successful relations and as the next step to something more serious. Do it in appropriate time, be tender, passionate and attentive.

Your first kiss should be as tender and as sweet as possible! Don’t try to put all her clothes off or ram your tongue down her throat! Women don’t like such kisses and such persistence. Look into her eyes, touch her face, manage to catch that very moment and kiss… She is sure to be overwhelmed by your charm, care and desire to give her pleasure!

If your kiss was ok, don’t stop where you are, ‘cause monotony kills passion and ruins feelings. Intrigue her, be innovative and develop your seductive art of kissing. Experiment with different kisses to keep the fire. Caress her with your hands in different sexy ways. Vary kissing her slowly, fast, passionately, sensually and playfully. Everyone likes to kiss and be kissed in a different way. But women are unlikely to be satisfied with lots of saliva and vulgarism. When you already know the desires of your partner, you may be more innovative and choose various kisses. Mind, that kiss is a vivid representation of our passion, care and desire! Cover her lips with yours, feel her gentle response, move your tongue exploring the realms of her excitative mouth. Feel the beating of her heart, press her body to yours, but don’t over-react. Stop at the most exciting moment; make her die with desire, make your first sex awaited, cherished and great! She wants you already – you’ve done your best and can be 100% sure of your man’s charm!

French kiss, Nip kiss, Suck kiss – your Art of seduction has no measures! Vanish into your kiss, give and get satisfaction, follow your heart and She will never resist!

How not to lay it thick after the first date

Your first date was rather successful, you both enjoyed the evening, spent wonderful time and… she gave you her phone number! Don’t force the events and don’t over-react, otherwise everything may be useless. Don’t hurry up to phone her, even if you have this burning desire! She expects this and you’ll do nothing unusual if call her next day, or even worse, the same evening! She may think that you are too obtrusive and won’t like to continue these relations. And that’s not we are fighting for, is it? The best strategy is to wait a day or two – such your line of behavior is sure to make her think of you. And that’s the first plus for our benefit!

Another taboo: don’t start chatting for hours telling about all the news in your life. Be precise and know exactly with what reason you are calling her. You don’t know this woman well enough and can easily spoil the whole positive impression of yourself if you begin to speak about those things she’d never discuss with a stranger (yes, I mean it! Though rather handsome, but still a stranger!). Speak on the most general topics, but on the other hand, avoid being too predictable. The best variant is to ask how she’s doing, say that you’d like to see her and invite for the second date. If she agrees, that’s another plus, if not, don’t lose your heart. Say, that you are really sorry and phone her back in a couple of days. Women like when men do their best in order to win their favor!

How to behave during your next dates and foresee her desires? How to see that she is “ready” for the next stage? There are no universal tips of advice here. You should be a good psychologist, analyse the situation and turn it into a suitable for you angle. Women as well as men do need sex, but they are not always ready to make the first step and show it. But it is not a universal truth either, ‘cause for some women one date is enough to jump into your bed, and with the others it will take more time and effort and not every man can agree to wait so long. But mind, that if you still decide to wait, you can be rewarded and get unknown before that satisfaction. Your own line of behavior is also very important here. You should be sometimes patient, sometimes insistent, and sometimes indifferent. See to it that you keep to your strategy and any woman is sure to give up in the end. Simply decide for yourself, whether the game is worth the candle!

How not to flop during the date with a woman

Before the date (especially, if it is the first one) males try to build a kind of a strategy upon which they act and which (in case of success, of course) finishes in bed. But if something goes wrong, we are likely to feel awkward, at a loss and our bravado disappears. Mind, that women are more sensible in this matter and feel everything we have only thought about. Women are usually far from being naïve, that is to say were not born yesterday and know perfectly well what your major intention is! So be careful, unless you are not afraid of spoiling everything from the very start.

Infect her with your positive attitude and optimism! Smile and show that you really enjoy her company. If you start complaining, consider your relation to be over. You may get her compassion, but nothing more! Make her laugh, make her be interested in your personality come wind, come weather.

Don’t be afraid to be rejected and if it happens, don’t concentrate on this small failure – consider it as the next step on the way to your victory and never give up. Let’s say, you asked for her telephone number and she refused. One can say, “Oh, ok, it was nice talking to you” and leave at once. But you not only have to stay, but you shouldn’t show any bitterness or disappointment, pretend you simply don’t care whether you get this number or not, continue your talk as if nothing had happened and, believe me, you are sure to get the number in the end!!!

Another example: you tried to kiss her, but she didn’t let you. The most common reactions of a man are, “Sorry, I didn’t mean anything of the kind” or sitting in silence creating awkward situation. The phrase of this kind won’t do, because you start lying (it is just exactly what you mean!) and sitting and keeping silent you spoil the whole impression of yourself. Distract her attention and continue the date. One battle is lost, but the war is sure to be won by you!

Another important thing you should mind: a woman will never sleep with a man, whom she doesn’t respect. Gain her respect, show yourself not only as a good interlocutor, but also as a good listener, interesting personality and an experienced seducer! Mind that Art of seduction and cross the bridge when you come to it!

Don’t be down in the mouth, if she, after you have seen her home, doesn’t invite you in. It doesn’t mean that she doesn’t like you. Perhaps she wants to take her time and doesn’t want to hurry or simply has monthlies. Do not insist, thank her for the great time you had and ask if you can see her again. She can hardly refuse…

Communication and Emotion in successful Relations

Let’s say that you managed to get acquainted with a nice girl and do not want to spoil these relations. What to do? (Or better to say what not to do?) Successful relations need constant work of both partners, ability to find compromises and the desire to understand our mate. It doesn’t seem to be difficult. Why are then everyday life and routine considered to be enemies of any relation? And what both of you should mind in order to keep that original warmth, tenderness and care?

Being a successful couple means being ready to sacrifice something for the sake of your mate without regretting it; putting your business off in order to listen about her quarrel with a friend etc. Successful relationships are always adding something useful to the union: money knowledge, household skills, setting goals, nurturing new and old friendships, building a beautiful home environment together, spending meals together, adding hobbies or other entertainment to leisure hours, increasing fun, intimacy, and physical love. Unfortunately, it is not at all easy and demands quite a large number of efforts.


One of the most important skills to master is the skill of communication. A friend of mine, who is happy in her family life, when asked about marriage and its success said: “Pretend not to hear something, pretend not to understand something, keep silent when eager to shout…” It really works, as it turns out. Communication can come in many forms, it does not always have to be a verbal exchange. Face expression, gestures, everything that the notion “body language” includes, is communication and it is part and parcel of successful relation. Sometimes one look is enough to break the ice or vice versa one wrong movement and your mate can take it as a personal offence. When it all comes down, it is a matter of upbringing and personal experience. But try to control your body language and the results will not make you wait long!!!

Communication is closely connected with emotions. Emotional, nonverbal communication plays a major role in all your relationships, throughout your life. Even the best verbal communication skills are not enough to create and sustain successful relationships. Without the ability to communicate emotion, it’s impossible to build or maintain healthy relationships, because the communication of emotions establishes the guideline that sustains all relationships. If you give emotional, warm, sincere emotions, you are sure to get even more back. So don’t be lazy and exercise positive attitude and optimistic approach!

Pluses and minuses of online dating

Today more and more people give preference to online dating. On one end of the spectrum, it’s really convenient, ‘cause you can easily choose the person you are interested in taking into account all necessary parameters like weight, height, zodiacal sign, religion, attitude to having children etc. You just choose these parameters and then find one or several potential dates. More than that while trying to find somebody through online web sites you can (and you should!) express yourself in full! Be honest and write not only about your virtues but also about your drawbacks. There are no ideal people and every female is well aware of this fact, sometimes even more than males. Don’t try to present yourself as Arnold Schwarzenegger being in reality closer to Jim Carrey. Not everybody likes muscles – somebody prefers good sense of humor and ability to be life and soul of the party. But what all women are sure to despise is lie. It is lie that they’ll never forget. If you start your relations (even online) from lie, they are doomed to failure from the very start.

There’s still a potential danger of being cheated by other people who at first site meet all your demands, but turn out to be maniacs, unbalanced people or people with some deviations in their psyche. Learn your date before giving her your e-mail address or some other details of your personal life. There’s another pitfall here. With the increase of online dating sites, there increased the number of swindles who make men get interested in them, tell tearful stories about sick parents, children or serious failure in life…They do their best to move you to pity, and you are ready to send them a large sum of money for “improving their position in life”. Do not let anybody trample upon you! And if you help somebody, be sure on what she (or anybody else) is going to spend your money. Otherwise you are risking to hear anything not only about “improved position in life” but also about the person who needed this improvement so badly!

These are the most important things you should mind while giving preference to online dating. If it so popular, why not trying your hand at it? There’s a number of examples when people got acquainted online, communicated, met and developed their relations. Online dating is also an excellent means of finding new friends and acquaintances. Be on your guard and control the situation unless you know the person well enough and can rely on her.

Casanova’s followers

Have you ever heard a notion “art of seduction”? Sure you did. Everybody knows the legendary Casanova and his unique ways of alluring women no female could resist. You are convinced that because of your bad eye-sight or overweight your chances for becoming one are miserable? Cannot agree. As it has already been mentioned, be yourself and mind the following information.

Reality. It can hardly be the best variant to start the relationship with a lie. If you lie once, you’ll have to lie twice and gradually you’ll hardly be able to say reality from lie. Besides it’s really difficult to lie all the time, remembering what was the first and the last your lie and how to react in this or that situation. In any case sooner or later you are likely to get caught and be tortured by numerous reproaches and oceans of tears. Mind that people like us and care for us for what we are, that’s why there’s no need to pretend trying to give weight to your personality. Finally it will bring you only problems.

Interests. Each person is sure to have some interests or hobbies. You are not an exception here, are you? If your interests are limited to cars or different types of weapon, or politics, it will be rather difficult for you to find common ground with a lady. In case you have nothing to say at least listen attentively without staring at her boosts and try to put forward at least one clever pr original remark. Let women justify their right to be chatterboxes and give them an opportunity to talk. Don’t blow it and manage to turn the conversation into that sphere where you won’t feel like fish out of water.

Health. It’s an open secret that choosing a partner women tend to concentrate on him as on the potential father of their children, thus, on the optimum reproductive abilities and features. Correspond! And for love or money smell good. You’d agree that nothing deters women as much as your (better to say somebody else’s) bad smell.

Buoyancy. Set your mind to positive. Remember, that positive always attracts positive. In all meanings. Don’t overindulge in this, ‘cause a man with a permanent idiotic smile is likely to trigger off only bewilderment and surprise.

Fairness. Treat your better half or girlfriend not as a maid but as an individuality with her own points of view and perception of the world. Even if she cooks worse than your mother don’t repeat it twenty times a day, otherwise you are risking starting cooking for yourself! At the other extreme, do not put her on some Madonna pedestal. She is sure to have her own self worth loving, respecting and caring for.

These are universal tips of advice in the matter of seduction. Women are looking forward to being allured. The main thing is to know how to do it without vulgarity and insistence. Don’t keep saying uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. It can quickly eat away her nerves. Be a strategist and keep to your own strategy!

How to call the Universe for help in love matter?

Having discussed the psychological and chemical causes of love, I believe it’s high time we got to attracting the opposite sex. How to do it and from where to start? Let’s regard everything from the very beginning.

Before searching for any kind of relationships, think what exactly you are looking for: one-time sex (no relations at all), sex from time to time (some image of relations, but preferable for some people), relations in order to kill time (your girl-friend doesn’t have the least inkling about your real motives) or serious relations with the possibility of creating a family.

For the first three cases there hardly can be any pieces of advice: pleasant appearance, the gift of the gab and self-confidence (for the extreme adventures medical certificate is also desirable).

I’d better say a couple of words about the last case when the word “relationships” acquires its original meaning.
So first of all find appropriate time and make a list of two columns: one column – those qualities you’d like to see in your future partner and the other – those qualities you’ll never accept. Try to concentrate only on the inner world of a person; the outer appearance is not so far important. Done? The next step deals with your imagination. Try to visualize your mate as detailed as possible. Think of what you can do together, what activity is likely to bring pleasure to both of you: going on a picnic, romantic dinner etc. By visualizing your future mate, you send some impulses to the Universe and the Universe in its own turn is expected to find you such a person depending on to what extend bright and legible your image is. If it is not clear enough, it’s you to blame if a person met doesn’t correspond to your ideas!

While visualizing your future partner, pay more attention to the inner world; don’t overindulge in creating the image of Penelope Kruz in your mind. Acting in such a way you may simply mislead the Universe. There are many individuals in the world who match your vibrations, and who possess the qualities you desire, but may not exactly match the outer shell you’ve made up in your mind. Thus, you may lose an excellent opportunity to find a suitable partner.

In cause of time you’ll meet women who possess qualities you need but not all. It’s up to you to decide whether it is the woman or not. But do not be in a hurry – it’s a kind of a test. The Universe moves people unconsciously toward each other. When that special one comes into your life, she will be vibrating at the same rate as you and you will have your perfect better half! You just say “Bingo!” and take the bull by the horns!!!
Before starting to think everything over, remember that loving yourself is also very important. Being happy within yourself, you attract others (see “Want to attract love? First learn to love yourself…”).

And don’t be too skeptical about this matter. Nobody knows for sure how the Universe works. Perhaps this scheme is not that senseless – then don’t take your time and start acting! As they say, nothing seek, nothing find!

What has Love to do with Chemistry?

Developing our talk about love, I’d like to scrutinize this very notion. In cause of history, mankind considered the heart to be the center of love. But scientists tell us love is all in our mind and brain. And fueled by chemicals and chemistry. It is believed by almost everyone that true love cannot exist without chemistry.

Several different chemicals take part in the process of falling in love. Some of them (phenylethylamine, dopamine and norepinephrine - chemical cousins of amphetamines) make us feel elated, energized and float on air – be head over heels in love! This is the so called infatuation or “chemistry” – the initial stage of love. It is during this very stage that new lovers can make love for hours and talk all nights long. This is the chemistry or the love sparks wee all are looking forward. Infatuation usually lasts up to 3 years, depending on the individual and circumstances.

Very often physical chemistry can be mistaken for the real thing. At one end of the spectrum the attraction is strong, at the other extreme these are not relationships that have the right elements to grow into happy and satisfying partnerships. Something is missing here…

This “something” is defined as “attachment” or “spiritual affinity” and considered to be the second stage of love (though sometimes can never occur). Endorphins, steadier and more addictive than PEA, influence its behavior. Being attached to each other means connection on a deeper level. It considers feelings of warmth, humor, respect, friendship. They say, one feels contentment while keeping silent in his/her presence. The longer two people have been married, the more likely it is that they’ll stay married.

We may agree or disagree with some of these scientifically proved points, but we have to admit, that these facts are not absolutely senseless. We do feel sexual chemistry or lust at the beginning of our relationships, which gradually ceases giving more space to respect and contentment of being together. On the other hand, love may spread omitting this first stage. There are many examples of couples that from the very start had all the “symptoms” of attachment. Besides, if it is all down to chemistry, why do we always care who becomes our partner? Perhaps, there’s another “chemical” explanation, perhaps, not. It’s a matter of dispute, but personally I’d like to believe that there’s still something in our hearts! Something does have to differ us from animals…

Want to attract love? First learn to love yourself…

I’d like to develop my first theme post to the notion of love, I mean sources and causes of love. Why are some people always in love and don’t know how to get rid of their next admirer and others suffer from everlasting solitude? You say because the first type is better, more self-confident, self-sufficient and attractive? To some extend. But what makes them special??? Loving themselves! That’s it! When person finds something worth loving and admiring within oneself, it’s a sure-fire way of attracting love into his/her life. Men, as well as women, are likely to find lots of drawbacks in their appearance and character. Gradually they work themselves into a pretty state when it suddenly dawns upon them that they have nothing to be loved for!
Nonsense!!!
We are unique, individual and manly! Every woman will be happy to have such a partner or lover! Remember that women like winners and tend to feel sorry about losers. You don’t want to be treated like a silly baby, do you?
When only you start recognizing that there are lots of things in yourself that make women being in raptures (there sure to be some!), this your self love starts sending imperceptible signals to the opposite sex invoking attraction, infatuation, affection and… (who knows, perhaps, it grows into something deeper???)
Learn to be and to love yourself! No one wants to have relations with a complete loser who values nothing in himself and triggers off only pity, compassion and what’s the worth - disgust.
Winners attract winners, success attracts success and on the contrary, anger causes anger, solitude provokes more solitude etc. This list may be endless.
The main idea I (as well as a number of psychologists) want you to realize is that without loving and respecting yourself you cannot expect others to fall in love with you. Be unique, don’t forget the way to the gym, respect yourself for being one and sooner or later love is sure to find way to your heart!

New blog for those who want to change their lives for the better

Hi, guys! I’m Alex Loudermilk and I’m glad to present this new blog devoted to making new acquaintances, all pros and cons of people’s dating online, some interesting and even extraordinary cases of such meetings that later grew into something deeper or simply remained online entertainment. I’d like also to share some sure tips of advice of how to get acquainted with the girl you like or have an unforgettable date even online.
If you find this information interesting, don’t forget to leave your comments and suggestions. And I’ll try to provide you with interesting and useful material about everything connected with women, dating and relations.